


Well, are we?

by Saoto



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/M, also there's some BeauYasha somewhere in there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-13
Updated: 2018-02-13
Packaged: 2019-03-17 22:43:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13668843
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saoto/pseuds/Saoto
Summary: Everyone knows they're together - except for them. So when Fjord is asked about his relationship with Jester... he doesn't know how to reply. Yet.





	Well, are we?

**Author's Note:**

> Boyyyy do I suck at coming up with titles!
> 
> I have been editing the shit out of this thing for days now (and it became twice as long in the process), so I decided to post it before I destroy it completely :'D  
> I just like the idea of them being such close friends that they can't even say if they are a couple or not. Basically "We're just best friends, but I'd kiss you if you'd ask".  
> The Fjorester tag on AO3 is empty enough as it is and I'm starving for content!

Some things are just natural, like running and walking. You could always run, you could always walk, without spending a moment to think about it.

And then someone comes along and asks a simple question: “How do you walk?” And while you’re trying to find an answer, you begin to trip over your own feet, you stumble, and you are forced to stop and stare. Suddenly, you start thinking about things you have always taken for granted, things that never occurred to you. In the twinkling of an eye they are all you can think about, and it’s a mess. You can’t walk in a straight line anymore; you can’t walk without calculating every single step you take. You are needlessly aware of it – and all because of a single, simple, silly question.

Except… this wasn’t about _walking_.

 

It had probably started that one night, not too long ago, when Fjord had taken the first watch again. It was chilly, but not yet cold, like it used to be on early autumn nights. He was sitting alone by the fire, watching the flames bite their way through a dry log, listening to the soft crackling of the burning branches. Then suddenly one of the sleeping bags on his left started moving and shifting, until the messy blue hair of Jester popped out from underneath the blanket. He watched the Tiefling roll around for a few minutes, her eyes closed, until she woke with a wince and slowly opened her eyes. She seemed to contemplate something, then she got up on her feet and sluggishly shuffled over to his side.

“The donut fairy was trying to braid my hair,” she muttered, matter-of-factly, and slumped down on the ground next to Fjord.

“She did?” he asked, not even daring to question whatever Jester meant by it. He knew her well enough to know that there was no way to understand what was going on in her pretty little head.

“Yeah,” Jester mumbled and laid her head on his lap, using him as a pillow without a second thought. “Her hands were sticky,” she added with a shiver in her voice, as if this would explain everything, from the creation of the world through to her far more cryptic words right now.

“And that’s what woke you up?”

“Yes,” she replied, pulling her blanket up to her face and snuggling into it, “and I’m cold.”

Fjord raised an eyebrow. “Don’t yer always say you’re warm-blooded and never get cold?”

“Yes,” she said and fell asleep again.

When Caleb woke up for the second watch and found Fjord sitting there, unable to move without fearing to wake the Tiefling resting her head on his lap, all the Half-Orc earned from him was a raised brow.

 

The next time was probably when they had visited a tavern a few nights later, having secured a few rooms for themselves, even with the inn being almost full to the brim with visitors – all of them in town for a local festival Fjord hadn’t caught the name of. They were sitting there, drinking, and watched Jester teach Nott how to draw. While Caleb was observing Nott like a proud parent, and Beau and Yasha were too busy staring into each other’s eyes, it had been Molly who had turned to Fjord and pulled out his deck of cards.

“Do you want a reading? I’m bored, with all the others being so engaged with _… whatever they are doing_.” He grimaced and tilted his head in the direction of Yasha and Beau sitting next to him, who had just started making out… very awkwardly.

“Sure,” Fjord said, trying to ignore the slobbering next to Molly, “what kinds of readings do you do?”

“Well, general readings, past and future, health, career, love …”

“Uuuh, gimme a love reading!”

Both of their heads turned to Jester, who was now leaning over the table, staring at Molly with sparkling eyes. Fjord could feel her shoulders pressed against his arms as she reached out to Molly and pointed at the cards in his hands. “Pleeease?”

“Alright…?” Molly said, more a question than a reply, and looked directly at Fjord with a raised eyebrow.

The eyebrow thing was quickly becoming the general reaction to everything regarding the two of them, now that he thought about it… He hastily nodded at Molly and tried to ignore the heat rushing up to his face.

Molly shuffled his cards and held them out to Jester, who eagerly grabbed one and turned it around to show the other Tiefling. Fjord could hardly catch a glimpse of it – all he could see was a woman, probably, wearing a crown.

“Good news,” Mollymauk said in a sing-song voice with a smirk, “the Empress symbolises romance and _fertility_ ; you have good prospects for your future.”

Fjord could have sworn Molly’s eyes had darted to him for half a second.

 

The final straw had apparently been the festival they could hardly avoid, with the whole city being busy preparing market stalls in the streets, decorating houses and putting colourful, shining lights in their windows. It was rather beautiful, Fjord thought, and he couldn’t deny he was looking forward to seeing all of this by night.

For most of the day, Jester had been braiding flowers into the hair of an excited Nott and a surprisingly enthusiastic Beau – and, after some persuading, even Yasha, who had insisted that she did not want to be a burden and keep Jester away from the pastries being sold all over the market place. So, in her stead, Fjord had been sent to buy some sweets for the Tiefling –  and who was he to say no when she looked at him with those puppy eyes? But returning to the inn proved far more difficult than he’d imagined, as the streets were filling with more and more people walking to the market square where most of the celebrating and dancing would begin soon. Fjord had to fight his way back against the current and through the less busy alleyways, taking a wrong turn or two in the process.

When he reached the inn again, Yasha, Beau, Nott and Molly had already left, and Caleb had stayed behind to read, while Jester had waited for her pastries to arrive. Yet when Fjord entered the tavern, she jumped from her seat, grabbed the bag of sweets and put them aside.

“Let’s go, let’s go!” she urged him excitedly and grabbed his arm, the pastries already forgotten. Caleb, sitting in the corner with a Zemnian book in his hands, just weakly waved his hand to acknowledge that they were leaving, but then raised his head… and there was the eyebrow thing again. Fjord could hardly register it as Jester was forcefully and enthusiastically dragging him out of the inn, her arm tightly wrapped around his own.

 

It was the same evening, after the girls had retired to their own rooms, that Caleb pulled Fjord aside the moment Molly had disappeared into the bathroom.

“I’m usually not the one to pry into someone else’s affairs… but, say, are you and Jester together?”

Fjord, who had just started to take off his armour, stopped in his tracks.

“What?”

That simple question had stirred up his thoughts, set the cogs in his head in motion – until they wouldn’t stop anymore to leave him a second to breathe. It started slowly, but the moment this train of thought had left the station, there was no way to stop it anymore. Like walking by intuition, thinking about Jester without this question in the back of his mind would suddenly become impossible.

He had been friends with her for quite some time – long enough, at least, to find her presence completely natural. She was a good friend to him, a cheerful person who always managed to get a smile on his face. He liked having her around, and she stuck to him whenever she could. She would randomly grab his arm when she was sitting next to him and keep talking to someone else, no big deal. She would lean against him and start snoring whenever she was tired. Heck, sometimes she would even try to feed him pastries like a baby. They _were_ together in a way.

But _together_ together? He had never thought about it. And now it wouldn’t leave his mind.

_Were_ they?

He didn’t think so, but you could never be sure with Jester. Maybe all she did was just normal for her; the way she treated any friend. But then again, she didn’t try to slip under Molly’s blanket when she was feeling too lonely to sleep or rest her head on Beau’s lap; she didn’t try to hold someone else’s hand just because she wanted to (except, maybe, Nott’s, but that was a completely different story). She only acted like this with the friend she knew for the longest time in this group of lovable misfits and weirdos.

That still didn’t imply _she_ meant something by it. Heck, even Fjord himself hadn’t considered it before this moment. Before Caleb asked that simple question and threw his thoughts into complete disarray.

“Nah,” Fjord eventually mumbled when Caleb’s stares and raised brow began to speak volumes. “I don’t think so. I don’t know. Do _you_ think so?”

“I wouldn’t have asked otherwise,” Caleb returned, the sceptical look turning into the rather rare mischievous grin Fjord hadn’t seen in weeks – the last time being Nott’s successful prank on Mollymauk, which had left the Tiefling hissing and cursing and ignoring the goblin for two full days. “But excuse my curiosity. I shouldn’t have asked. _Auch wenn es völlig offensichtlich ist_ …”

Now it was Fjord’s turn to raise an eyebrow, not getting a single word from that last sentence. But he knew well enough not to ask, reading the look on Caleb’s face when he turned around with his usual, weak smile and went to bed to rest for the night.

 

“Okay, listen, dude, if you keep staring at her like this, she’s gonna think you’re planning to murder her. Either that, or _do_ her in the next alley we come across, and I’m pretty sure I know which one you’re thinking of.”

Fjord nearly jumped when Beau whispered directly into his ear. He had completely spaced out, staring at Jester’s wide smile as she and Yasha (to his own surprise) examined the pretty little trinkets laid out in a shop window.

“…who?” he asked, trying his best not to stutter. He was quite aware Beau knew just as well that _he_ _knew_ the answer. Didn’t mean he couldn’t try though.

“My girlfriend, obviously,” she mumbled, her ruff voice oozing with sarcasm. “ _You know exactly who I mean_ , and it clearly isn’t my girl, or else you’d have a black eye in that handsome face of yours.” The way she rolled her eyes, Fjord was almost surprised they didn’t get stuck in the back of her head.

“I just thought she’d look good with that… necklace?” he muttered, trying to hide the fact that he had no idea what Jester and Yasha were eyeing with so much enthusiasm.

Beau’s face told him he was wrong with his guess. “It’s a choker, if that’s what you mean,” she drawled, nodding her head in the other girls’ direction. “You should buy it for her, if you’d like to see her in it.” That grin, right there, told him that the phrase “ _and only in it_ ” was hidden somewhere between the lines.

He liked Beau, he really did, but she wasn’t helping right now.

“Sure,” he muttered and walked over to Molly, who was too busy standing by and not saying a word to bother Fjord as well.

 

Hearing the same implications twice was one thing, but the third time’s the charm. He had managed to keep his eyes to himself most of the time, and when he caught himself staring again, she luckily never seemed to notice. But somehow, even though Jester didn’t treat him differently than every other day, now even the people outside of their small circle of friends started seeing them in a different light. Or maybe it had always been like this, and he just hadn’t noticed before – which was more likely.

But the next time they had reached an inn, Fjord had been tasked to get them some rooms while the others were drinking their ale at a table close to the fireplace. The bored innkeeper looked at him, then at the rest of the group, and didn’t even think twice about the room arrangements when she eventually said: “So, a room for the good sir and his daughter, the ladies, that ostentatious guy in the corner, and one for you and your wife?”

Fjord nearly choked on that one, which the innkeeper luckily didn’t notice – or at least didn’t comment on.

“Just… give us four rooms and we’ll somehow manage the rest,” he said and avoided the woman’s eyes as she pressed four cold, rusty keys into the palm of his hand.

He hadn’t even reached the table yet when Jester jumped from her seat, grabbed Fjord’s arm and pulled him down on the bench next to her.

“Ayy, Fjord!” she said, her violet eyes sparkling like amethysts in the light. “Nott just said she spotted a shop that was selling a lot of _cool maps_ of the area! Let’s go there tomorrow and buy one before we leave the city, ‘kay?”

Fjord didn’t even dare to meet anyone’s gaze except hers at this moment. “Sure thing,” he replied and returned that smile she was gracing him with. “…you’re low on money, right?”

“Yeaaah.” She grinned sheepishly as she scratched her cheek and turned her head back towards the others, resuming their discussion on whether or not the Crownsguard had noticed Nott stealing a bag of herbs and a healing potion from the market that afternoon (Jester was proudly declaring that Nott was definitely skilful enough to avoid being caught by _anyone_ ).

 

They wouldn’t share a room that night. Fjord was almost glad no one had even suggested it. Beau and Yasha shared one, like always, and so did Caleb and Nott. He shared his own room with Molly – and Jester, to her own disappointment, had a twin room to herself. Fjord was glad when he finally fell into bed, drugged with fatigue and the effects of the beer he’d drank (he really, _really_ wasn’t a fan of alcohol). At least now his thoughts would leave him alone.

Or… maybe not.

It was one thing to feel so strongly connected to a person that they could be your best friend or spouse or _both_ , and it wouldn’t change a thing for you. But it was a completely different thing when the thought of being together with that person suddenly took over your whole life. Didn’t that usually mean there _was_ something more to it? And yet, if that meant their wonderful dynamic, their friendship, could change, he didn’t necessarily want an answer to the question he had been asking himself nonstop. There was always the fear she would stare at him with unblinking eyes, a look of horror on her face; or laugh at the audacity that he would even entertain the idea; or ignore him from that moment on, an awkward silence surrounding them.

_Yeah. No. That did not sound like Jester at all, not in a million years_. Fjord frowned, eyes closed, and tried to push these sleep-stealing thoughts aside.

Even if he dared to ask her about it, she would either laugh it off, clutching his arm like she did so often, and continue to treat him the exact same, friendly way she always did. Or, in the not-so-far-fetched case she actually felt that same, intimate bond between the two of them, she would answer in the affirmative and carry on with whatever she did that moment. Either way, it would hardly change anything for them. That’s just how Jester was, and that’s the way he felt about her. It did not necessarily need a label.

Not that he would _mind_ one, to be fair _._

 

A tug on his sleeve roused him from sleep. The gentle poke of a finger against his cheek made him open his eyes. He turned his head, vaguely making out the slender shape of a girl in the darkness. When she gently whispered his name, he forced his eyes wide open and propped himself up on his elbows. In front of his bed stood Jester, dressed in her white nightgown, and not moving a muscle. For a moment he wondered if she was sleepwalking.

“I can’t sleep,” she whispered, sounding wide awake. “I don’t like being alone.”

Something in her voice made his heart ache; they had been traveling together for so long, and since they’d met Jester had always shared a room or fireplace with someone – either the other girls, or, before that, Fjord himself. _She didn’t like being alone_. Why had he not thought about this? He had been too busy with his own, silly thoughts.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered back, sitting up in his bed and glancing worriedly at Mollymauk. The other Tiefling hadn’t stirred once since Jester entered the room, so they probably were okay. “Do you want to sleep here?”

“No,” she replied, her gaze following his towards Molly, whose chest was slowly rising and falling in a steady rhythm. “I wanna sleep in my own room.”

“Should I come with you?”

“Yes, please.”

Oh, the rumours that would start the next morning! But Fjord couldn’t care less at this moment. He was tired, and Jester looked exhausted, and he was in no mood to argue against her. Heck, he didn’t even want to object to her request. He got out of his bed, tried to find his balance, and then followed Jester to her room at the end of the hall.

 

The next morning – or so he was told by Nott – Molly, still half asleep, had tried to wake his roommate up and found his bed empty. When neither Caleb nor Yasha could tell him where Fjord was, they had immediately thought the worst: that Fjord had taken a walk and had been kidnapped; that he had run away for unknown reasons; or that one of his strange dreams had let him outside, where he had drowned himself in the ocean (they were, in fact, not even close to any body of water). All theories proved to be false when Beau had finally decided to wake Jester and ask her if she knew anything about it. They had found Fjord in the second bed of the room, and Jester – who was not lying in her own – cuddled up to his side underneath the thin blanket.

It was then, that very same evening, that Nott had turned to Jester and Fjord, a familiar sparkle in her big, yellow eyes.

“So, does that mean you two _are_ an item after all?”

To Fjord this sounded like it had not been the first time Nott had asked Jester that question. He turned his head towards the Tiefling and watched as Jester pursed her lips in deep thought before returning his gaze.

“ _Are_ we an item?”

Fjord just shrugged his shoulders, smiling. “I don’t know. _Are we_?”

Jester seemed to contemplate that for a second, then she nodded her head and turned back to Nott.

“Yeah, I guess we are.”

He had been correct. Nothing had changed. Nothing _would_ change. And, after having lost more than just a few nights’ sleep over these thoughts, Fjord was actually glad Jester had finally resolved that mystery for him in such a quick and simple way. And the solution had been: _With or without the label of being “a couple”, their relationship was the same._ It didn’t change a thing.

_Okay, maybe_ a few _things will change_ , he thought and smiled as Jester planted a kiss on his cheek, right before she leaned back over the table to show Nott her latest drawings – as if nothing had happened at all.

And from the other end of the table Fjord could only hear a triumphant voice, almost drowned out by the noise in the tavern: “ _Ich hab’s euch doch gesagt!_ ”

**Author's Note:**

> A quick translation of the two German phrases in there:  
> "Auch wenn es völlig offensichtlich ist..." = Though it's plainly obvious...  
> "Ich hab's euch doch gesagt!" = See, told you so!  
> (Watch me as I take advantage of being German and using German phrases whenever I friggin' can :'D)


End file.
